Friday, February 9, 2018

Paradox (2017)

Some serious foot to face chaos... with more than a little heart...



So really it was only a matter of time till action directors around the world but their own spin on the TAKEN films. Really, I think pretty much everyone has seen it or at the least knows of it - Liam Neeson's daughter is kidnapped and he brings the pain to the evil doers while tracking her down. Great set up. So why not inject it with some Thailand/HongKong type violence and see what happens.

What we have here folks is a Grade A bonified action good time. I don't want to use masterpiece, because well there are definitely a few missed notes... But... over all...

Here we go. You're story. Thai bad guys kidnap a hong Kong cops daughter. He comes to town teams up with a local cop and together they start tearing through action set pieces to find out what happened. It seems she has been kidnapped by organ dealers... and time is running out.

I promise you if you read that and think you know where this story goes - you are dead wrong. As was I. This film takes itself way more seriously than I expected, and this plot folks - man it goes full dark. The violence is up to any standard you wish to hold it too... I would say at least to John Wick levels from North American reference.

Tony Jaa (of ONG-BAK) is all over this poster... and gets top billing, but really he is not in any way shape or form the focus. When I realized this I felt a little sad, but thankfully the other two leads are equal to the ass kicking requirements. The fights are a blast... a little unfortunate wire work... but for the most part its all face paced and well shot. The main set piece near the end is just a blast. The main villain is more or less the typical over the top "Foreigner" and that's fine he can hold his own in a fight and that's what matters.

It's just - damn this movie goes dark. And I think I really appreciated it. There is some actual real heart felt rage here. This father, you are gunna feel for him in ways mister Neeson just didn't really worry about during taken.

I would say over all PARADOX (which by the way, I can not understand that title - maybe because Tony Jaa had a vision at one point?) is a top tier action surprise. A few minor and i do mean minor moments might deny it masterpiece status - but it is dang close. If you like your action bloody and in bulk this is for you. Just, expect to feel a little stir in your cold heart... it'll happen I tell ya!

ONE LINE REVIEW: A swift roundhouse to the feels. 

Finding awesome films like this is part of the reason I love cinema... and the thai action seen - Ong-bak, Chocolate, this girl is badass, bangkok Knockout, etc, is bumping folks. They don't show any sign of slowing down!

Movie review: 3.5 out of 5 stars
Action movie scale: 4 out of 5 stars

#Paradoxthemovie
#Paradox2017
#TonyJaa
#KungFU

Till next Booniacs!!!

-Boonsweet out!

Friday, December 22, 2017

Bright (2017)

LORD OF THE RINGS MEETS END OF WATCH... YES. AND YES.



So I think its time as a society we just accept that Will Smith... as an actor (say what you will about his singing - Summertime is still my jam) is one of the ultimate root for good guys. Somehow from almost day one he has been able to get an audience to buy him as the down on his luck forced heroic type... and he has played the character many times... but I for one love it every time. Much like I love Arnold blowing up the terrorist group de jour. Or Willis double fisting hand guns... some peeps just got a groove... and Will... he's the lovable-damn why me- hero type.

Your plot... Modern day Los Angeles in a world where Orcs, Elves, and various other creatures are part of society. Think of it as what if after lord of the rings ended society just kept evolving. Cars, and cell phones, and TVs and orcs and magic right along with them. Well here we are Will Smith - WARD, paired with the first ever Orc cop - Nick... They are gunna have to survive a lot of prejudice, some Orc gangsters and Elves... hell bent on resurrecting a Dark Lord with a magic wand... a rare and powerful thing.

Why, do you keep putting up this wall of mistrust Will... why... 

Director David Ayer has had quite the directing (and writing) career so far. Much of it in the gritty "Real world" of crime and police. For me Street Kings will forever rank as one of the greatest of the genre (criminally underrated) and End of watch - though getting a ton of praise as one of the biggest disappointments (sorry that ending still crap)... and while suicide squad split the public... I would put it somewhere between the two for me... That said... the man is an undeniable talent. Having finished this rather large budgeted Netflix offering, I have to note no one other than David could have pulled this off.

The reviews have been mixed at best, and I'm really not too sure why. 1. Good to great acting... 2. Solid effects and directing... 3. One hell of a bat shit crazy plot... mixed up in a cauldron and boom, a little bit of magic. Maybe its that such a grand scale piece of entertainment was offered up on a streaming service... and that is just unsettling to some people. But hey if you don't like your grand fantasy on the small screen - guess you won't be tuning in for the LOTR series coming to a streaming service near you in the next couple of years... its a thing... look it up...

Also when did action films start having to be oscar worthy? haha I mean I have actually read reviews about Bright being overly silly... It's a movie about an Orc cop and Human cop chasing elves with a magic wand... check ya reality dip stick at the ride people. The fact that the material is handled so violently and seriously is nearly unimaginable. I found myself smiling and enjoying every glorious bit of straight faced insanity. Reviews listing this as Garbage, colossal waste... I mean what? An R rated fantasy cop film... which as near as I can tell... is an absolute first... I mean read the tagline to start this review... you ever seen that? I haven't writing it I had a grin... Sometimes I just feel people have forgotten they used to enjoy movies.

And unlike End Of Watch ... and Suicide Squad (to some extent) Ayer really keeps the ball rolling here... with a pretty fun and satisfying ending. To anyone stating that the "Surprise" at the end was seen coming a mile away... Yes... of course it was... in fact I don't think it was ever meant as a surprise... its stated in the first 15 minutes of the movie... so really if you are upset you saw the reveal coming... sounds like a "You" problem.

Explosions. Elves. Orcs. Gun battles. At least two solid throwdowns, and wand destruction... all wrapped up in a gritty cop drama haha if that doesn't intrigue you... you probably are not reading this review... or any of my reviews for that matter. And hey, its on netflix... you all have it already (unless you're saving your quarters for that incoming Disney one... cue evil music)...

ONE LINE REVIEW: Keep your wand loaded, this one has some magic in it!

Movie scale 3.5 out of 5 stars
Fantasy/action scale 4 out of 5 stars

Apparently Netflix has already picked this one up for a sequel... I for one am dialled in... Next time I demand a wizard! Stallone the white! Oh wait... Van Damme the white! Yes!

Overall a great piece of fantasy fun for the older members of the Fam...

#Bright #Netlfix #BrightReview

Till next Booniacs....

-Chuck Boonsweet

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Star Wars: The last Jedi (2017)

MORE LASER SWORDS AND NOT MUCH ELSE....



Ok I just saw this film. And I am going to say something here... Disney is taking over the entertainment world... they Just bought 20th Century fox for 50 plus billion... and are apparently buying (or have bought) Hulu... and sitting here watching THE LAST JEDI ... all I could think was - critics must be terrified. I mean if you make your career breaking movie news, getting the inside scoop from star interviews - I mean how can you possibly take a washroom break on anything with a Disney logo? Because what if they decide to hate you? Cut you off? I mean no movie news... no TV news... and away you go.

And why was I thinking this while watching THE LAST JEDI ... because half way into this film i realized it wasn't great, maybe good, maybe ok... but not great by a regular film standard, and certainly not by a star wars expectation. Yet, every review I read pre release has been on average a 9 out of 10. Witness at the time of this interview - 93% on rotten tomatoes ...

Ok before I got to the freaking dark side here... Mild spoilers... mostly confusion to follow.

Your plot. While the empire/First order (the entire fleet?) try to destroy the rebel fleet (that is moving slow but somehow faster than them - and somehow just out of range...) for the entire movie... Rey tries to learn the ways of being a Jedi from Luke (cue dramatic music) Will the slowly moving rebel fleet ever escape... will Rey manage to become jedi - ish...

Well I'll tell you what will happen they will stretch that plot for 2 and a half freaking hours! Ok. Ok. Look I want to point out a few positives here - ONE - I freaking love me some Rian Johnson aka the man that wrote and directed. BRICK is hands down one of my fav films ever, and LOOPER is a decent bit of cool sci fi ... so when I heard he was involved in episode 8 ... heck yes! Sign me up. So you know, I signed up - with my hopes... and dreams... and well, I mean the man has a great eye for his camera. Still got it on that front.

Rey is in my mind a great heroic lead... and her struggle to harness her powers and maintain her path in the light, is the stuff of jedi gold. Do I understand at the end of this movie how she basically mastered light sabre ness without any training? Nope, no explanation, in fact she seems to have gotten better. Oh well episode 9 maybe will clear it up... You see Rey because you are so powerful it doesn't matter that you came from nothing and nowhere without any training, you just know everything - look try some back flips - ya you got this. 

And I like Finn... great actor and cool secondary lead. A nice everyman trying to better himself from predetermined origins to prove he's more. I dig it and his relationship to/with Rey. He is a strong lead and its honestly a shame he doesn't have much to work with here. I would've even enjoyed his side plot ... BUT ...

But look... you can go plaster me with hate if you so desire - I won't judge - in all honesty this film will probably still make a billion... but I watched an entire theatre walk out of this film in silence... a packed house.... a pre opening night screening... people in storm trooper outfits... a guy in star wars shirt being partially held together by duck tape people... duck tape. And they all walked out of this show in silence. That can't be a good thing right?

I'm not joking the entire film is the empire... sorry.... first order... following a ship they can't catch.... for some reason... can't shoot ... for some reason... don't lose sight of... for some reason... and can't send smaller ships out to destroy for some reason. All the while people manage to come and go without the empire noticing... imagine if you will you are watching an action movie... with a car chase... and the cop looks to the camera and goes well we can't catch up, and my bullets won't reach... so we'll just keep following and eventually - this guy will run outta road... and now, imagine thats a two hour plot... and thats basically it. You spent two hours following a slow car chase but you can't give me one fight... one that last longer than a couple minutes?

A great example of the writing issues with this film - That giant door is absolutely the only way in or out of this bunker... Cut to less that a minute later doors open on another level and jet fighters shoot out... whaaaaaaaaa in the sweet #@#$. Or Wait didn't you just betray everyone, and take over a ship? Why is everyone like - oh you, you're the best. 

Ah I wanna drop spoilers... but like the dark side of that turkey leg... i shall resist.
I want someone to explain to me all the ways this movie didn't suck... but I mean is continuing to scavenge the bones of the original trilogy really the way to go? This is a movie that could've been a 30 minute episode of an animated show. Wanna contradict me? Try haha... I think the best evidence that Disney feared it might have a rather weak entry in the franchise... they brought JJ Abrams back to write and direct the next one... already announced (after he specifically said he was done) you know what that tells me early test groups were not good... and Disney got worried. And yet, I have read review after review... glossing over the pacing issues, the side plot issues... ONE HORRIBLE decision with a main Baddie... let me guess... you thought it would be shocking?!

Stupid, and pointless... does not a shocking twist make.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh - I just don't feel excited, or pumped, nothing I just feel blah... something a star wars film has really never left me. There was always an excitement for the next, or pure joy at what you just witnessed. Hell, the Phantom Menace was not great, but it was the first Star Wars film in decades... so that carried me through. But this - maybe my expectations were too high. Review contamination haha... but aren't I allowed to have sky high expectations for a Star Wars film with a small countries net worth invested in it?

This is my first reaction... maybe I will come around when I sit down to watch it at home months from now... maybe everyone on planet earth will love it and I'll feel like a big ol' Dummy. But you know what... I got nothing to Gain from Disney signing off on my compliance haha... so screw it! This is weak sauce with a capital thick.

Movie score - 2.5 out of 5 stars
Star Wars movie score - 2.5 out of 5 stars

ONE LINE REVIEW: The force is extra medium with this one. 

Suggested drinking game rules : 1 shot every time a character's eyes well up (bonus shot if that character is staring into another characters watery eyes). 2 shots for every tear that escapes the aforementioned watery eyes. 

That's it... i'm tucking my lightsaber back in the PJs, and curling up to John Williams soundtrack love... To all a merry Christmas... and stuff... and OH YEAH I"M FREAKING BACK. Mostly. Life A.D.D. here people, its a thing.

I hope I'm wrong on this one ... i really do hope I somehow just didn't get it, or missed something. A last thought everyone keeps talking about the shocking twists ? The commercials all over TV are screaming - don't let anyone spoil this. I watched the movie. I feel unspoiled.

To all my Booniacs... remember to polish your BB-8 once to twice a day - BOONSWEEEEEEEET out.

#StarWars #TheLastJedi #review

-CBB

Wednesday, November 9, 2016

The Accountant (2016)

HE'S MAKING A LIST, HE'S CHECKING IT TWICE... WAIT... NO THATS... DAMN.



Well. I wanna be honest. I did not have high expectations for this film... in fact if you watched the trailers you probably though - as I did - well Ben Affleck here is just pulling a Matt Damon and getting his Bourne on. But, low and behold, we have ourselves a genuine unexpected action treasure here.

Ok. Your plot dear Booniacs... A boy grows up with a high functioning autism and through the efforts of his determined military Father, developed the skills that eventually lead him to a career as a very high end accountant to the criminal element. Also, a pretty formidable opponent should you choose to cross him. Anyway, enter a new client, and then they make the mistake of trying to kill him, and a cute female employee (the always somehow alluring Anna Kendrick) and he of course decided to prevent that.

Seriously... unimpressed with - them apples. 

Yes. I know what you are thinking, Ok Chuck, Charles, Mr. Boonsweet, yes the autism angle might be a little newish, but the rest... Nah thats by the book stuff. And you know what you right, you right internet world. However, really, are their any ideas left? I submit no. And if you find one, you are probably sitting in a theatre in france, trying to mentally process the 4 hour art project examining love in the 5th dimension of time...

Really, its about how well you do a known story these days. Its taking your expectations and still managing to make you laugh, or cheer, or invest. And this Accountant delivers.

So first, to anyone that wants to poop on this film for how they handle autism, and blah blah... because I'm sure there will be some... shame on you. This is a film that really highlights some of the struggles, but more so (whether hollywooded or not) what they are still capable of despite in some cases severe behavioural issues.

How to properly select your "Start the day" emoji. 
Thats out o the way, lets just talk how fun this movie is. The acting is top notch... if you are as of yet still not a Affleck fan, well, this probably won't change your mind... but he nails it here... the cardboard awkwardness... the cold calculating killer when he needs to be... the absence of processable emotion... the action is a blast. This is kinda like the thinking man's JOHN WICK if you will. More plot, a little more heart, and slightly less bullets to the head... though that last one is debatable.

The director, who admittedly I only really know from Warrior (A very good film) does a great job of calmly capturing the action with a certain lack of emotion I am sure was meant to capture the essence of the main character, as well as the muted colours (ya I'm going scenery deep in this people), really bring the presentation and the protagonist together.

Overall this will rank as one of my very pleasant 2016 surprises.

And the way the year is going, no doubt one of the best action films as well...

Movie scale 3.5 out of 5 stars
Action scale 3.5 out of 5 stars

Till next Booniacs.

#Theaccountant
#BenAffleck
#hastagsarestillcool
#Boonsweetout.




Thursday, August 4, 2016

After School Massacre (2014)

don't cut class....



So you like you independent horror films? You are a champion of the B movie, the C movie, and hell after 21 and a half drinks the D movie as well? This may be one of those rare modern cheapies that is worth your time... AFTER SCHOOL MASSACRE !

Your story goes... There was a teacher... an attractive teacher than some of the more whore type students wanted to hook up with in ... High School? haha I think (hello this film suffers from adults paying kids). SO he gets fired over a student trying to Facebook friend request him? I guess. Ok. Then decides they all deserve to die. And theres your plot (why does a chick OD at the beginning? No idea)

Ok well, I will admit I thought this was just another run of the mill cranked out on a college project type budget... It starts off with a bunch of sexy (but clothed college girls because in this new era of independent horror apparently nudity is impossible !) chicks apparently having a make up type slumber party... but then a strange moment of decent acting in writing caught my eye...

And then the coolest opening credits sequence I have seen in a long time... and so on point with the story that I actually adjusted myself on the couch and thought... Well Ol' Boony... you might have something here....

AFTER SCHOOL MASSACRE has its cheap tongue buried in its cheaper cheek... And I was having fun... the acting is cheese... the writing is cheese... but if its the right cheese thats ok right? (I direct your attention to most of the well loved 80s haha) So I try to review any of these films with the same open mind I approach the B movie splatter fests of decades past...

Much like those films every once and a while the acting seems to catch up with a great moment in an otherwise by the numbers script... and I smiled. Really, I'm watching an off the mainstream bit of indie cheese... if I'm smiling thats enough.

Holy side boob! Remember what I mentioned about no nudity happening in all these DTV flicks... ya... prepare yourself for one of the most aggravating nude/butnonude scenes ever. Be still my long ago teen heart. Hey ever wanted to see a chick get killed with a mailbox? Then this is for you.

1) Chick Slumber party
2) Pajama dance party
3) Two guys that sneak and watch them through an open window
3.5) one of the guys is wearing a fedora...

Check, check, check-check.

Its all here folks. Listen if you don't believe that women ... young women... when partying alone... immediately (after two shots) strip (to only underwear) and dance and grope each other... then you sir... are a man... who has forgotten the hope, and dreams, and trust... of your younger teenage self.

Don't let that poster fool you there really isn't that much gore here...  a lot of blood cough ups, and spit ups.... but thats about it. Is this a good movie - NO. Haha but really if you saw that poster and were tempted, should you care about that - NO. Because you have accepted the level of crap this film is ... and know you will still enjoy it. SO then this is for you. Yes if it took place in the 80s... there would be non stop nudity, and practical gore... and it was be a slasher classic.... but they tried their best and for that, I for one, appreciate them...

Movie scale 2 out of 5 stars
Horror/slasher scale 2.5 out of 5 stars

Also... really why have a ghost type chick haunting anyone and not make her the killer? For example... all of the girls (minus a survival girl) slept with her man which is why she killed herself... and now she possessed the body of the teacher they want and she seduces and destroys them all? Ya that woulda made a lil more sense... but hey what do I know...

Oh ya. - EVERYTHING !

K. Booniacs... till next... keep your stick on the gridiron...

(football - seven weeks!)
#AfterSchoolMassacre

-CBB

Sunday, July 10, 2016

Captain America: Civil War - VS - Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice

2016

Battle of the twice named superhero flicks.
Marvel Vs DC.
Capes vs slightly less capes.
However you wanna cut it since superman went one way and stan lee the other, Marvel vs DC has been a fun and awesome thing. Now with bankrolls that would make most of us cry, Warner and disney, have fueled the conflict to a whole new level.

So in the battle of 200 million dollar throw downs who won?

Ok. I am going to summarize my argument here... so that if you wanna skip all my sharp... intelligent... witty (and the list goes on) thoughts on he topic, and go right into nerd hate mode... you may. I embrace your uneducated and firmly self founded stance. Haha... jokes. I Boonsweet, heart you all.

BATMAN V SUPERMAN IS THE SUPERIOR FILM.

Your breast feels firm batman... so firm. 

Boom.
Now considering the crazy backlash Barman V superman (to be called BvS for the rest of this article) has had, how can I possibly make this claim? Well if you read my BvS review then you probably know where I am coming from. Captain America suffers from two major.... major flaws. One it does not take itself seriously. Oh there are people out there saying BvS was too dark and too serious... and hell I think I agree with you. But BvS took a chance, and basically incorporated storylines and plot points direct from the comic story line.

Humanities response to a god like hero... the hero as a man, trying to understand his role and his responsibility to a planet not of his own. And to anyone that says "Superman is not all broody and dark, he is suppose to be all light and fun" ... well... you of course are basing that on the cartoon series, and not on the actually comics. Did you read the arc where superman kills three super villains in an alternate universe and then abandons earth because he feels he is tainted and deserves to be alone? Ya. AN ENTIRE STORYLINE entered around a brooding superman... in the 80/90s... or how about the new comics launch... where humanity wanted him destroyed basically and he could barely motivate himself to be the hero he would come to be.

So yes DC took a risk and did not water it down for the public and instead of embracing this, the net nerds as a whole blasted them for it. We the supposed defenders of the original source material, the believers in truth, and justice, and blah blah... Yes it had its flaws (Lex *cough, Luthor)... but its still the better film.



Look. Both films look great, are well acted, the fights are fun, so really this comes down to one major problem.

Marvel doesn't have the balls.

Marvel has PG nuts. Thats the problem. In Civil War they can't help themselves but to have characters that are supposedly at opposite ends of an insanely important issue... crack jokes and dumb the violence down so its kinda fun and not really threatening. And the net nerds support it?! Im sorry have you read the CIVIL WAY COMICs ? Captain freaking america dies!! Or how about how Thor is dead so Iron Man clones his DNA and brings a drone Thor to life to rain judgement down on Cap and his pals.

None of that happened.

Or how about how villains rose up with the heroes to defend their right to secret identities... nope.... none of that happened either.

And yet. No one cares. Review after review ... Marvel proves once again how much better they are at this... and blah blah... and BvS gets blasted for "Bastardizing characters and story lines" ... what?!

So without the balls every fight essentially comes across as fun. Basically brothers fighting... which eliminates any real threat to the heroes or the children in the audience watching the movie. Well done marvel.

Now on to the second major flaw... How they handled placing spiderman in this film. Ok. 1) to have me believe a seasoned hero Tony Stark, aka the man of iron, would decide a 15 year old kid should be throw in the middle of a would be throw down to end all throw downs - only proves even he doesn't take the stakes of this fight serious. But the real problem is, they clearly didn't think about a truly organic way to get Spidey into the Marvel universe...They were just like - get HIM IN THE MOVIE.

Do you wanna watch Boonsweet fix this? Ol' Chuck here work some magic.... Cap and his pal the winter soldier aka Bucky, come from brooklyn... so while on the run they stop in brooklyn to kinda refresh their past and help Bucky with his memory issues (hell maybe even turns out Bucky has a relative still alive)... However Iron Man knew they would show there and an unfortunate fight breaks out between them... Spiderman (who operates in queens) sees the commotion and shows up trying to beg them to stop before Brooklyn gets levelled... unsuccessfully he tries to stop both sides before being taken out and Cap realizing he's just a kid which eventually leads him to realizing their fight has just destroyed blocks of his former home (whole lot closer to the comic by the way) and he then retreats with bucky in the ship that iron  man came in... which allows the ending as it was in the film.

Boom! Spiderman worked into the plot organically, and a more serious tone to what should have been a life and death struggle.

Marvel at this point is basically following this arc - Hero - hero conflicted about hero-ness - a scene or two with humour - hero must get serious again and defend his hero-ness - also regular humans are tricky! And sprinkle in other heroes ... because just like a modern hip hop album... its best to have three people on every damn track.

Le sigh. Marvel played it safe... and we rewarded them... DC took a chance and we crushed them. A,m I excited for a happier lighter hearted Justice league film... YES!! But I think BvS had to happen to get us there... had to examine what being a hero meant... and newsflash... it should be more than being able to spout one liners in the middle of a throw down.

I am not saying BvS was a perfect film... it was not... clearly... however in the battle of the comic companies, i think it was the far more involved film. I mean think about it this way, since you have seen Civil War, did you even talk about it really? Or did you think about it a week later? No it was fun, and fluffy, and you smiled, and were happy with spending you $$ to see it. But BvS you debated with friends, left a few comments on a blog to debate something... argued with a guy you barely know about some aspect of it... it affected you. For better or worse it left an impression... and that to me is proof of its superiority. It stayed with you.

As always. I appreciate the support and non support and hate and love, and everything this modern age of film grants us geeks!

Till next Booniacs!

#CivilWar
#DawnofJsutice
#BvS




Monday, April 25, 2016

Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

Haters gunna hate.



Listen I want to start this review by explaining one very important point: No one really gives a crap what marvel does. Sorry, but its true. You might here a little rumbling here, or there, about casting, or plot changes... But really for the most part, no one cares. Why? Because marvel has essentially grown up within the public as a film entity. Meaning that fans do not identify with the comics, or history, of the characters, but rather the celluloid presentation. Where as with DC... and Batman, and Superman... well thats a different story. I mean my Grandma, who has never cared About seeing any grown man in spandex (her words haha) can tell you Batman and Superman's origin story. They are characters that our burned into the big old fabric couch of our universe.

I remember seeing a shot of a rally in a country half way around the world... protesting the murder of their people... and there in the middle of the clash between a corrupt government and a desperate people was a child wearing a superman shirt... That folks is when a character transcends medium and becomes a message. Did I go deep there? Yes. Am I sorry? No. Because its true. The upcoming Captain America: Civil War... which sees arguably the most famous Marvel Story line ever... completely changed and twisted for the big screen... Has garnered almost no hate from the Nerd-verse... yet it is a bastardization of the source material. But thats OK BECAUSE ITS MARVEL and really, it will probably be a fun flick so who cares...

So maybe the fact that Batman V Superman has divided so many fans is proof of the importance and influence of its characters. As well as why people are just so damned critical of anything that comes from DC (yes you all remember when the net nerds cried bloody freakin' murder with Heath Ledger was cast as the joker... They were totally right on that one ... right? haha silly Haters). But any film concerning these characters feels like an assault, a threat, against our childhood... and well maybe something closer to our core than most would admit.

Ok... look... Lex had hair in the 90s... seriously, screw you Clark!

I waited a while to write this review. And before I do your plot... if you need a plot...

Superman newly revealed to society after the events of Man of Steel has caught the attention of the Batman, as a would be threat to the whole planet. With a wee be of Lex Luthor behind the scenes... the stage is set for Superman to battle both the reaction of a word to him, and all he represents, and Batman's own paranoia and desperation to maintain a control of what he believes is the protection of mankind. Oh. And Wonder Woman is hot and stuff.

Ok. DC stepped up, and dropped wonder woman on us. Was she entirely needed in this film, no, but it was time to bring a female character of her level (sorry, but really who the F cares about black widow) to the big screen. And Gal Gadot nails her from her small role in this film... I for one am stoked for her solo flick.

Ben Affleck, despite having to be a crazed Batman for a portion of this film is a blast, and the batman throw down action causes giddy. Trust, he fills the tights nicely. The cameos in the film to set up the Justice League film... are a little forced, and Aquamans... is well... just awkward... buuuuuuuuut still cool.

Sweet hell did DC and Warner really go for it here, and that is a part of the reasons this film for forever be divisive. First, they had the balls to pull the What would society really think of a Superman type hero, how would we as a people react? A theme that has come up many times in the comics... including the brilliant first 6-10 issues of the New ACTION COMICS story line... in the new 52... and yes i just nerd-ed out there for a moment... I still read comics... so unlike most of you... (and I speak to the haters) I know what I am talking about. Still it is something that has been skipped past in most marvel entries who have just focused on fun... and hey there is nothing wrong with fun... reference my saturday nights... Boom! But what is wrong with a superhero film trying to be something more?

I say nothing.

I have heard critics say everything from There was not enough action... to Non comic fans won't get this movie... Ok to the first point. What!? There is action all through this film... is there a good chunk set aside to build the Lex Luthor villain... and the batman, superman, conflict... yes... and a little Lois Lane in there... But there is a ton of action.. most of the last hour in fact. Balls to the wall. To the second point... Non Comic fans ... the hell are you dumb-asses talking about? These movies are making billions at the box office... the biggest sports apparel company in the world has a superhero clothing line... WE ARE ALL COMIC FANS NOW... and dammit... people are not dumb. I think they can handle it... well unless all they do is read reviews and ignore their inner desire to see something for themselves...

NOTE: Unless it is a film featured in my CRAP! segment in which case I have taken the hit for you... please... for the love of god... do not ever watch any film in my CRAP! segment... for your own well being... that is all.

Is this a perfect film? No. It is a set up for the films to come. There is also the problem of Lex Luthor... Jesse Eisenberg plays him like a cool psycho with style.. and I am sorry, it does not work. There are moments when he gets it... and comes oh so close, and they next thing you know he is all jerky motion, and look at me I'm such a cool evil guy and it doesn't work for the whole film... but there are moments.

The final fight though jaw dropping at some points also loses some of its power with the cut aways to different things going on during the battle. I would've been fine watching them throw down with no interruptions for like 45 minutes... haha... seriously. And heck with this rumoured 3 hour version on blu-ray might just get my chance... whoop whoop.

Also... and even the biggest fan of this film will admit I'm sure they did over stuff this stocking. I understand it, basically trying to set an entire universe up with one film... and it almost works... but there is just a lot going on (one particular dream/vision/future scene is confusing as heck and hell I know all when it comes to this spandex wearing punks) but hey... its a blast, and worth every bit of the money you paid.

I had to put this here, found it online... drink it in folks... cause it is freaking happening!

Movie scale 3.5 out of 5 stars
Superhero movie scale 3.5 out of 5 stars

This is a solid first (1.5) chapter of the new DC universe... and although I was a little bummed we did not get a little glimpse of the probable big bad - Darkseid - for the Justice league flick... Still very excited to see where it goes.

One line review: Tights, bright lights, an amazon in a ballgown and one heck of a throw down. 

I will leave on this... my comic shop guy said to me the other day... "You know, I look at it like this... every one of this films would have been the greatest film of my childhood back in the day. You know. So I love them all, its just so damn cool I get to see it" Ya. He's right. We have all been spoiled. And need to indulge that inner child a bit more I think.

#BvS
#ManofSteel
#teamSuperman

Boon sweet out!