Monday, December 9, 2013

Stalled (2013)

I WOULD NOT GO IN THERE!!!!



Man, there are few things I love more in my favourite genre than a small indie horror zombie flick proving to be a few dentures above the rest.

Tagline "When there's no restroom in hell, the dead shall walk the earth" Hahaha gold.

Hello Booniacs, it is I your giggle inducing, so bad you - shutyamouth, reviewer, mentor, all around fantastic hombre - Chuck B. Boonsweet. So here we have it, the increasing rare, no budget horror flick, with a little heart, a lotta gore, a couple boobs... and well, just a lot of fun.

So if you were to look this film up on the almighty IMDB.com the plot summary is as follows: "A Janitor gets trapped in a women's restroom and encounters an all out attack by a zombie horde". There is surprisingly more than a little bit to it.

Washrooms are for experiencing new and exciting things
First that is the plot, well, most of it. But what makes this film a really good time is the writing. As with any film, on any budget. The writing is key. I had just watched MACHETE KILLS before this flick, and while watching STALLED all I could think is No stars, no money, and still 124 % awesomer than Rodriguez tried so very hard to be. Script is the most important thing, second is directing, and boy do these crazy blood soaked cinema loving small time filmmakers get their moneys worth.

All practical. Yup. Face eating. Body tearing. Toilet bowl head smashing, made by hand, makeup. Ya, all your horror/zombie fans just sat up and started paying attention didn't you. Ya you did. They use the simplicity of the plot to allow for some great creativity. A girl ends up in a far stall, and they can't see each other so the guy draws a face on the wall of his stall, while he talks with her the camera often drifts to this cartoon marker face. A small silly effect that has a surprising sadness, and realness to it. You get invested in her character even though she's a voice and a stall scribble.

Oh, you will be mine donut. You will be mine.
Some of the best creativity has to be launching severed fingers at an alarm box by way of a Bra-slingshot... Ya, let that visual sink in.

There's some very well crafted plot details in the mix. Such as why does this guy's toolbox have no tools, and a few thousand in cash inside? Who is this girl in the other stall, is she real? Will he get out? Can a screw driver hold a zombie head to a stall door? Are their really zombie rats?

Bottomline I think for most fans of smalltime big fun zombie adventures this is right up your alley. Ya its a low budget venture, but the payoff is pretty damn fun. Of course even indie movies have to do the "Screw the hero over" ending nowadays, and I can't just hype the flick up and not mention my disappointment at the final few minutes. It's as if all filmmakers have congregated and decided, "Hey let's never just let a movie end with the audience cheering" What kinda punk B.S. is that? Very frustrating and perhaps no more than in the horror genre.

You all know what I'm talking about. It's getting to the point you should just turn off a film with about a minute and a half left. Seriously. Arg.

But hey, everyone's doing it so maybe I shouldn't hate too much right? The film has it's heart in the right place. Body parts in the right place, and is a damn fine way to pass 84 minutes. I laughed, I cheered, and I nodded in bloodletting approval.

Movie scale 2.5 out of 5 stars
Horror/zombie scale 3.5 out of 5 stars

There have been a few brighter spots on the indie scene hopefully this continues. Although anyone see the trailer for that MIME killer flick? Ya a slasher with invisible weapons. That one... may take us back a couple hahaha.

Also extra Boon points for title recognition  - Ace for Life!

Till Next punks!

-CBB
@Tallwhitefox

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